Don’t Be Too Hard On Jose Canseco
Published by Charles Jay on June 2nd, 2009 in Operation Cleanup

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I don’t want to be rough on Jose Canseco.

I look at him the way I look at the baseball career of Michael Jordan. Sort of.

While it is true that when he played for the White Sox’ Double-A farm club in Birmingham in 1994, Jordan hit a paltry .202 with 51 RBI’s, the question must be asked as to how many people could have literally walked in off the street, having not played baseball since high school, and hit .202 with 51 RBI’s at any level of professional ball, keeping in mind of course that the precision involved in hitting the horsehide is a much different discipline than putting an inflated ball through a hoop.

Consider what Canseco had to encounter. Here’s a guy who is approaching his 45th birthday, and last competed as a professional athlete at the major league level in 2001. Sure, he had stints in an independent minor league, and put gloves on against a couple of people, but was any of that supposed to be preparation to fight Hong Man Choi, a 7’2″ human being who has at least thrown punches in anger in the past? I don’t think so.

Please don’t make me count the draw against Danny Bonaduce (where the former Partridge Family star was re-invented alright). When last seen in a ring, Canseco, with a seven-inch height advantage, was going to the canvas in a heap after one punch against a former NFL player named Vai Sikahema, whose most recent experience was in his habit of throwing body shots at the goal post support after returning kickoffs for touchdowns.

The harshest critics wondered whether Jose had lost his mind, awash in anabolic steroids, and I must admit that he appeared to be a glutton for punishment, whether he was on the field of athletic endeavor or not. I mean, was there anyone taking him seriously? Not since Super Dave Osborne has someone made a spectacle of fumbling and stumbling in such solipsistic fashion. Canseco got a head start – literally – on all this almost 16 years ago to the day when he was playing outfield for the Texas Rangers and got hit squarely on top of the noggin by a ball that then bounced over the fence for a homer. Then three days later, he threw out his arm pitching one inning at his own insistence.

He just has a habit of figuring out one way or another to make himself look bad.

Now it’s the knee that is giving him fits. It’s always somethin’.

I, for one, applaud him for his latest effort. I’m not sure he realized how much bigger his opponent was going to be. Canseco came out at the bell and threw a big overhand right, which came about an inch or two away from stunning the giant. Then it was a brief series of punches and./or kick attempts, followed by awkward ducking and running. One of his kicks supposedly junked up his knee, and down he went, subsequently unable to handle the sloppy ground-and-pound of the Korean.

But hey, he got in there and tried. he lasted a minute and 17 seconds, which means he got farther than he did with Sikahema, and actually had Choi confounded for a second or two.

At least he lasted longer with Choi than the sumo wrestler Akebono, who lost bouts in 24 and 57 seconds during his moonlighting madness. That’s something Canseco can brag about when he’s on the town picking up chicks.

He’s well on his way in his latest career, and should be able to find a lot of guys who want to fight him as soon as the knee heals up, although I must admit I am still waiting for Canseco to chalk up his .202 average and 51 RBI’s, relatively speaking…..

…..while at the same time acknowledging that MJ never had to deal with a seven-footer pounding him in the head, and that includes Bill Cartwright.